26 February 2011

meet the family

I'm sure none of you remember Tracy...

Poor Tracy.

Anyway, so I busted out ye olde Barbie box for MK earlier. She played with them/looked at them for about 3 minutes and then left.

I decided it was high time to introduce the remaining (mostly) healthy cast... and a few short memorials to those who've gone before.

So without further ado...
(PS Click on their names if you'd like to see their former glory. It's really depressing.)


I have no explanation for their hairdos... except that I felt the need to chop and alter everything I got my hands on. I don't guess much has changed.

Julia also suffered from an unfortunate skin-grafting accident.


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Another long-haired Barbie who was once amongst my population was this one...

image borrowed from 1000barbies.com

Yes, she came with a tube of Dep. I can only imagine what that did to polyester Barbie hair. The only memory I have of this classy gal was her naked self hanging by her matted hair from the clothesline with several swimming-pool-abused and mildewed sisters... like so many skinned squirrels.

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Teen Courtney doll whose given name has escaped my memory
Straight off the plantation.


Where she moved after hanging out with Mariah Carey.

PS Never Google the words butterfly and tattoo together unless you're interested in seeing a lot of unfortunate crack-baring, muffin-top-surrounded tramp stamps.

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Kenneth and Michael

Big pimpin'. Straight thuggin'. Insert other ghetto phrase-ology. My apologies for the lack of links on these guys. Apparently Ken has found his way into the hearts and homes of gay men who collect Barbies and maintain blogs that will make good little church-going gals blush. Don't ever Google Ken. Consider yourself warned.

And speaking of gay, in my short-lived Ken search, I did happen upon this guy, who also once graced my Barbie community...

Meet Earring Magic Ken
Image borrowed from lynneslovables.com

George Michael?

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Reese
Pocahontas meets early-90s formal wear meets Chiquita Banana.

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The poor, orphaned, lone child of the group. I don't remember creating any official family members for him. He had a twin sister, Stacie, who as I recall experienced a trampoline incident in which she lost an arm. She is no longer with us.

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And this...
this is Sister Vestal.
She wouldn't take nothin' for her journey now.
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One big happy family.

Kinda.

1 comments:

SLD August 24, 2011 at 8:48 PM  

You have no idea how funny this is to me. My mom and dad are purging their sheds in preparation to move and she unloaded all of 'my' boxes for me to go through which included a wide array of Barbies and Cabbage Patch Kids. It is so funny how many of the Barbies (and Kens) that you have posted that I had, too.